Posted on Sep 20, 2010
I was on blogspot to comment on post and I read Bri's <<-- click here to check her out) blog and instantly felt every ounce of it..I have no respect for a women who knows a man is in a relationship and continues to pursue him. BUT I will not go further..just read please."The infamous side chick, yes the role that many women have played, maybe even you, you know the girl that comes second, sometimes even third or fourth to his main chick, oh yea her, the one he goes home too and is the most loyal too. You see the whole side chick role is much like a car ride. You have the driver, your man, you; the passenger, and HER, the chick in the backseat. In some instances both women are aware of their roles but when the side chick wants to hop in the front seat, or the passenger wants to kick the backseat rider out problems will arise. Both women must know their role and play it, and I mean play it well. Now do I agree with the whole side chick, “girlfriend #2?” Well of course not. In no way shape or form is it okay, BUT if YOU do decide to be a side chick know that you will forever be a back seat rider, and even if his main
somehow flakes out you may get a chance to ride shotgun around the corner but it is only a matter of time before you are kicked to the back or out of the car entirely.
Not every man has a side chick and in my opinion REAL men don’t. Firstly if a man is not ready for a committed relationship then of course he will have side chicks. Women often try to mold men into what they want or “need” them to be. “I want him to be a family man” and he might be that, but if he isn’t ready for a monogamous relationship after he tucks in little Jordan and Lauren he will be out in the streets headed to his side chicks house where he doesn’t have to worry about the kids interrupting sex. Now I am in no way saying that this lifestyle is okay, but what I am saying is that you have to choose a man wisely. If a man isn’t ready to commit, he won’t, you can’t try and mold him into what YOU want him to be. Either he has it or he doesn’t and YOU cannot decide from him.
Now for my ladies who already have a man and want to keep him YOUR man, then I firstly suggest you have expectations. “I expect you to be faithful, loyal and honest with me” now this doesn’t necessarily mean that he will meet the requirements but this goes back to choosing the RIGHT man. But if you are in a relationship and you have the mindset that “men will be men, they all cheat” then he is going to cheat on you. You have opened a door and made a side chick okay because he knows you will forgive him, you already expect him to cheat. Secondly know your place in his life, be the women he needs you to be. You are his rock, you know the saying “Behind every great man is a great woman” be THAT woman. Be his best friend first, and we all know we don’t nag or disrespect our best friends (and if you do you need to reevaluate your
friendships). Only a selfish man will walk away from a woman that is everything he needs her to be, and a selfish man is not a man you want. Selfishness is childish. “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.” 1 Corinthians 13:11
So to all of you beautiful ladies out there, I suggest you take my advice, know that there are men out there who do and always will have side chicks so save yourself the trouble, love YOU first, choose wisely and the rest will fall in place."
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